His will, p.2
His Will, page 2
“Mommy, too tight,” the little boy complains. He wriggles out of Sera’s grip and pins a blue stare on my face. “Who you?”
“Your uncle.”
“Un-ca?”
“He’s a friend of your daddy’s,” Sera supplies.
“Where Daddy?”
Sera bites her lip. A woman comes bustling in, shoving me to the side. “Let me take the boy, Miss Sera. It’s dinner time. You hungry, my boy? We’ve got french fries and dinosaur chicken tonight.”
“Yay!” the boy shouts, and allows himself to be carried out by the older woman.
“That’s Dora, Asher’s nanny,” Sera explains. She picks herself off the floor and dusts her wrinkled silk skirt with her hands. “Thank you for coming today, but regardless of what the will says, Asher and I will be fine on our own.”
Her green eyes meet mine defiantly. Blood rushes through my body and pools in my groin. My cock swells, and the urge to pick her up and fuck her on the bright yellow sofa of her child’s nursery is almost overwhelming. I ball my hands into fists.
“With what skills? You have no college education or even a high school diploma. How will you pay for your nanny or the Ralph Lauren baby clothes on a waitress’s salary? Or do you have other ideas on how to make money?”
Sera’s mouth tightens. “I know what you’re implying, and it’s disgusting. I can do childcare in my home. It’s what I did before Michael and I married.”
“In what home? You have no property in your name, and I’ll not give you one cent if you leave this house. In fact, if you do try to leave, I’ll sue for custody.”
Sera gasps. “You monster.”
I shrug. “I’ll do what I need to do to fulfill the wishes of Michael, which is for me to raise his son and for you to continue to live the life to which you have become accustomed, which is 24-hour maid service, a chef on call, annual trips to Nice and Barcelona, luxury accoutrements.” I flick the collar of her dress, the five-thousand-dollar couture item that was probably hand stitched. “None of that will be possible on whatever salary you can make out. So let’s put aside all these ridiculous arguments. You’re not moving out. And you’ll do what I tell you to. Here are the ground rules.” I tick them off one by one. “There will be no man in your life. No dating, no sexting. Nothing. You’ll act like a nun until Asher graduates from college. You will not leave town without my permission. Should you desire to attend any social event, it will be with me by your side. For all intents and purposes, we will act as a married couple just as you were with Michael. It will be in the best interests of Asher, and that is all I care about.” With that, I turn on my heel and let the door slam behind me. It’s not until I reach the first-floor landing that I’m able to breathe again. This is the longest time I’ve spent with Sera since the night before she married Michael. I have avoided her as much as possible because I knew that if I was in her presence for any length of time, I would want to finish what we started that night.
I don’t know how in the hell I’m supposed to keep my hands off of her. Her body was made for sin—lush tits, wide hips, tiny waist. Her face is the one that I see whenever I jack off, and now the only impediment to having her is gone.
Did Michael know what he was doing when he left Sera in my care? How am I supposed to watch over her and not be in her bed plowing her every night until dawn? I choke on the bitter irony. Maybe Michael did this to punish me for lusting after his wife. It’s a suitable punishment. Every day with her will be hell.
4
SERA
He’s staying.
A pile of suitcases sit by the front door along with a few boxes. “Someone dropped them off a few moments ago,” Dora tells me. “I’m guessing this means he’ll be staying?”
“I guess.” It’s not a few small bags. I’m not even sure if Jericho is in town because of Michael or if he lives in the city.
I think Michael said he has a few homes but travels a lot for work. These bags don’t look like an amount one would travel with. Especially the boxes. He had to have had them brought over from somewhere within driving distance. There is no way he managed to plan this so quickly.
“Which room should I put them in?” Dora asks, always willing to help.
“You’re not putting them in any room. He can carry his own crap.”
I’m not going to do anything to make Jericho feel welcome here. He can handle his own bags. He’s made it perfectly clear that he’s not going to make things easy for me, so I plan to return the favor. I don’t even understand why he’s doing this. It’s bullshit.
I didn’t realize he knew about Asher, honestly. He obviously did. I hadn’t missed his comment about Asher clearly being Michael’s son. It’s true. Asher is the spitting image of his father. I both love and hate it. I think with time I’ll love it. Right now, it still hurts so much when I look into Asher’s eyes and see Michael. He was the only person that has ever loved or cared about me. I would probably be curled up in a ball in some corner with grief if it weren’t for Asher.
Michael must not have told Jericho that Asher isn’t mine by birth. He is legally mine. If Jericho thinks he will take my little boy away from me, he’s got another think coming. Over my dead body will that ever happen. I love my baby more than anything else in this whole world.
I knew Jericho was making a dig at me being a whore. He can think of me as a whore all he wants, but it’s not going to be acceptable for him to speak that way in front of my son.
“Which room will be mine?” Jericho comes strolling out of Michael’s office. He’s making himself right at home.
“I’ve got to get back to Asher. Unless you—”
“I’ve got it, Dora. Thank you for getting the door.” She nods before turning to leave.
“I wasn’t prepared for a guest.” I try to hint that I don’t really want him here. I’m not sure why I do it when I know it won’t make a difference with Jericho. He couldn’t care less what I want.
“Any room will do.”
“Do you really need to stay here? I mean—”
“Michael clearly thought I needed to be here for some reason.” His words are a smack to my face.
Tears sting at the back of my eyes. Did Michael really think I was incapable of taking care of Asher? I’d held us all together over this last year without so much as missing a step.
“Follow me.” I get out, turning and heading up the stairs to the top floor. “The guest room was converted to meet Michael’s medical needs over the last year. You can have the master bedroom.” I push open the double doors. It’s on the other side of the house and the furthest from Asher and me.
“You don’t sleep here?” Jericho steps into the room.
“No, I sleep in a different room.” He glances around.
“I can’t take Michael’s room.”
“It hasn’t been his room for a long time. He actually had me remodel it for some reason.” It had been an odd request, but Michael often made those kinds of requests. I thought maybe it was something to keep us busy. He knew how I was getting about leaving the house, and still even while dying he was trying to keep my mind off what was happening to him.
“Where is your bedroom?” He cuts a look my way.
“I have a room next to the nursery, but sometimes I sleep in the nursery.” That might be a small lie. I haven’t slept in my room in months. It felt cold and lonely in there.
I’d spent so many nights on the sofa in the spare room with Michael. It still looks like a hospital room. I haven't been able to step foot in it since he died. Honestly, I haven’t been able to do a lot of things I used to since he passed away.
The world had lost some of its color the day Michael left us. I’m merely going through the motions. I haven’t felt this lost since I’d run away when I’d only been sixteen.
“Did you and Michael ever share this room?” I stiffen.
Michael was a private man. It’s partly why I’m surprised he’d told Jericho about Asher. He kept most things from his family when it came to his personal life. I do know out of everyone, though, he favored Jericho. I don’t know why. He’s a jerk.
When I first met him, I thought he was so different. I’d been drawn to him in a way I’d never been to any man before. I’d been so wrong. I’d wasted my first kiss on a man who thinks women are only good for one thing. Or maybe it’s only me he thinks of that way.
“It’s a simple question, Sera.” Even in Michael’s death I don’t feel right telling anyone Michael’s business.
“No,” I answer honestly, knowing Jericho will probably push if I don’t. I’m not going to give him a reason to poke at me. I’m barely hanging on by a thin thread right now. I’m not sure I can bear him being rude to me at the moment. “I’ll leave you to it.” I turn to leave him in the bedroom but pause at the door. “Jericho.” I glance back over my shoulder at him. “You can think of me as a whore all you want, but please if you have any respect for Michael or love for Asher would you keep those comments to yourself in front of my son.”
“I—”
“There is a reason Michael kept Asher away from this family. But I know he didn’t think you’re like them. I’m sad to say he was wrong. You’re just as cruel as the rest of them.”
I don’t wait for him to respond. I slip from the room, closing the door behind me and go in search of my son.
5
JERICHO
She’s avoiding me. Its always empty chairs in the dining room and ghost quiet halls. I’m not a fan.
“What was the point of this, Michael?”
No one answers. There’s not even a whisper of sound in this antiseptic bedroom that Sera had turned into a hospital room. She hasn’t been in here since the reading of the will, and dust is starting to create a film on all the surfaces.
It smells like her, though. At least this sofa does. I stretch my fingers along the leather of the cushion and inhale, trying to capture the last, lingering essences of her.
“Did you know how I felt about her or did you give her to me because you believed I would be the only one to protect her and your kid?”
I kick the empty IV stand, and it rattles along the marble tiles until it strikes the end of the bed. The clang of metal against metal is the only answer I receive.
Michael’s motivations aren’t clear, but his intention is. I’m to raise his kid and make his widow happy. The latter is easily achieved by leaving. There’s no condition in the will that I live in this house or even be in the same zip code as Sera. Yet I moved in immediately. Took up residence in one of the rooms, hung my clothes in the closet, and ate at the dinner table—albeit by myself. Sera has locked herself on the third floor with Asher.
“You were never into girls or guys, Michael, so why Sera of all people? Did you feel sorry for her because she was young and poor?” I squeeze my forehead. “I despised you for taking her. She was eighteen! She hadn’t even begun to live, and you took her away, turned her into a mother before she was even out of her teen years herself. Then you left her. Damn you.”
I squeeze harder so that the pain drives away my grief. I don’t have any right to be angry. I kissed her when she was eighteen. I didn’t know she was that young at the time, but would I have stayed away if I’d known? Would I have allowed her to experience life on her own or would I have, like Michael, hidden her away in a castle and plowed her until my child was in her belly?
Probably the latter. With a curse, I stand. These moronic thoughts are leading me nowhere. The past is past. My friend is dead. The woman I want is his widow and the mother of his child. These are my cards, and I need to play the hand dealt to me.
It takes no time to climb the stairs to the third floor. I unlock the gate and hunt down my prey. Light laughter leads me to an exterior door, where I find Sera and Asher sitting on a patch of AstroTurf laid onto a large section of the rooftop deck playing catch.
The boy catches wind of me first. He drops the ball and scuttles behind Sera as if I’m a monster come to eat his heart.
“Good morning.” She greets me with a stiff smile. “Have you eaten? The eggs and bacon are cold, but the pastries are fresh if you like.” Her hand directs me to the table situated under a large canopy. Fresh juices, thermos of coffee, platters of fruit, and the aforementioned pastries decorate the surface.
I fetch myself a plate and bring it over to join Sera and her son on the ground. Michael’s blue eyes stare at me out of Asher’s face. “I can’t get over how much he looks like Michael.”
And not at all like you.
“He’s precious.” Sera drops a kiss on her son’s head. “Come out and give Jericho a proper hello, Asher. “
The little boy peeks at me from the safety of Sera’s arms. “Hullo,” he repeats, and then ducks back to bury his face in his mom’s chest.
“Asher is shy,” Sera explains. “Because Michael was sick, we didn’t get out much and now…” She trails off, a chagrined expression taking over.
“Now what?” I press.
“We don’t go out at all. Asher gets alarmed by unfamiliar places and noises, and me, well, I’m not much better.”
I hadn’t given much thought to how this place must be like a prison for them. I’ve been too wrapped up in feeling sorry for myself. “Then we will have to go places. Has Asher been to the zoo?”
“We went once when he was a little baby, but I doubt he remembers much. Do you remember the zoo, Asher? All the different animals in one place?”
The little boy shakes his head, not bothering to come out from his hiding place. Sera smooths a hand over the back of his hair.
My own hands form a fist. In a different universe, Asher would be mine. He wouldn’t be scared of me. He’d be sitting in my lap or throwing me the Nerf ball. Venom fills my mouth, and the urge to spill it out, cut her open, and poison her wounds is very real.
“I’m sorry,” she blurts out. “I’m sorry for all of this. For kissing you when I was about to get married. For putting you in the situation where you have to look after me. For everything. I’m sorry.” She bites her lip and then buries her face in Asher’s hair. “I’m trying to do everything right because Michael and Asher are the only family I’ve ever known, but I think I’m failing. Please don’t hate me. Please don’t make this place, this home, unsafe for us.”
The hate turns to ash on my tongue. “All right,” I find myself saying. “We’ll put the past behind us.”
Her head comes up, and luminous green eyes stare into my soul. “Do you mean that?”
Thick-throated, I can only nod. When she looks at me like this, I’d lay the world at her feet.
6
SERA
Relief blooms through my chest as a weight is lifted off of it. One that was far heavier than I even realized. My eyes fill with tears, but I fight them back. I don’t want to cry any more. I want to move forward. This last week has been hell. If not for Asher, I would have never made it.
“Mama happy?” Asher places his hands on my cheeks, giving me a giant smile.
“Yes, Mama is happy.” His question helps dry up my tears quicker. It’s almost impossible to remain upset when I’m around my little guy.
“You want to go to the zoo then?” Jericho asks.
“I’d love that.” I peek over at him.
While I’ve done my best to avoid this man, he has still ruled my every thought. At times, I was almost thankful for it. When I’m thinking about Jericho, I’m not thinking about Michael.
Jericho watches me. He always is. Even when I try to sneak in and out of the kitchen so that I don’t have to be around him for too long. I’ve found that whenever he enters a room, I’m quick to exit it. But that doesn’t mean I don’t feel the weight of his stare the entire time we’re in each other's presence. I have to admit that it confuses me. For someone who dislikes me so much, he stares at me a lot.
“I’ll make some arrangements. Does four work for you? I need to make some calls.” I nod. Michael always said Jericho was married to his work. And that it always comes before everything else. According to what Michael told me, he used to be the same way until Asher came into his life and changed all that. He’d finally started to live life until he sadly lost it all.
“We can be ready to go by then,” I tell Jericho before turning my attention back to Asher.
“It’s settled then. Be downstairs at four,” Jericho says before I hear him turn and leave the roof.
I get a little flutter in my stomach, but I know it’s because I’m nervous about going out. Asher and I haven’t been out in a public setting in a long time. Especially not without Michael by our side. But even though I’m a little on edge about going, I know it will be good for us to get out of here for a while.
“You want to go see the animals?” I ask Asher as I stand. He holds his hands up, wanting me to pick him up. “You’re getting too big for Mommy.” I lift him and carry him back towards his bedroom. I check the time to see we have a while before we’re going to leave.
I try to keep us busy to distract myself. Asher goes down for his nap easily enough. It gives me a chance to get everything together we might need before I head to my bedroom to find something to wear. That’s a task in itself.
I settle on a simple cotton mini dress. For the first time in forever, I actually take the time to put on a bit of makeup and do something with my hair. I decide on a butterfly clip to pin some of it back. I love this clip. It was my favorite for a long time.
I debate changing it out. I’d been wearing it when I first met Jericho. He’d actually called me butterfly that day. He told me the clip was fitting. I take it out and then put it back in two times, worried Jericho might make a rude comment about it when he sees it. Even though he said it was a new start between us, I don’t want it to spark any memories for him.
